Sunday, October 21, 2007

Lies, Denial and then Truth!

At first, I dont think I would like to post this thought of mine. But thinking it was my effort to write and consider it as one of my 'writing' is valuable, then here I go. I was on duty as a checkpoint in the Merdeka Marathon when I wrote this. I felt so boring so I make this new post to my blog. Last night, I saw that person online and as usual, we didn’t talk. Actually I am tired of being denied. Our last conversation was in SMS. I think everybody will agree with me that this is kind of denial  “Siapa ni?..Napa? Ada hal penting?”

This is only a kind. I received lot more. By the way, I was hung up twice before that SMS. Think, if you were me, you trusted that person, u respect that person, you have no intention to disturb, you were sincere to at least to say ‘how r u?’ .. Will you ever imagine to have replied like this? Tell me what it feels when you tried to call someone- you were hung up, then after introduce yourself, you got such kind of SMS? Piss off man! I get it now. All the feeling that the person has given me wasn’t genuine. It derived from desperation with another person which is then stimulated to me. Noting more, nothing else, nothing less. Think back, is this what the person means by ‘teman tapi mesra’? Well, yeah.. teman tapi mesra my ass! LMAO.

Of course I was dump already. No big deal and I don’t want to say bad things or complaint about it… It is just that I’m so relieve because I know the truth about what was going on. TRUTH comes after LIES. I’m fine! In fact, DENIAL is cover to the LIES. It is not my best interest to lead on and not a good intention to punish someone. All I wanted to do is to move on to be what I am…keeping the truth that I have no place to stay in that person’s heart. Sooner or later, I will learn to love my solitude.

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